The Pirate Movie is a 1982 Australian musical romantic comedy film directed by Ken Annakin, and starring Christopher Atkins and Kristy McNichol. Loosely based on Gilbert and Sullivan's 1879 comic opera The Pirates of Penzance, the original music score is composed by Mike Brady and Peter Sullivan (no relation to Pirates of Penzance composer Arthur Sullivan).
The film performed far below expectations on its initial release, with negative reviews from critics, but has maintained higher ratings among audiences. Together, they hatched the idea for a comedic film adaptation. Initially, Papp was approached to direct, but he declined because he had his own plans for a film adaptation of the musical.
The producers then turned to 20th Century Fox studio, which not only agreed to distribute the film but also provided two lead actors for the project. Kristy McNichol, renowned for her role in the TV drama Family, had transitioned to a film career and was eager for another big-screen opportunity. Christopher Atkins, who had made a splash in The Blue Lagoon, was a notable presence in teen magazines. Both actors were invited to watch a production of The Pirates of Penzance in preparation for their roles. McNichol said that she was bored by it, and Atkins believed he was cast primarily due to his resemblance to his Broadway counterpart, Rex Smith. Atkins was under contract to Columbia Pictures, which lent him out to Fox for the movie, and then took half of his profits. Although McNichol had sung professionally and released the album Kristy and Jimmy McNichol with her brother Jimmy, she went to a vocal coach to prepare. Meanwhile, Atkins, who had no musical experience, not only had to be taught to sing, but underwent extensive dancing and fencing training.
As the production gathered momentum, Hamilton enlisted Trevor Farrant, a collaborator from previous projects, to craft the screenplay. Farrant received a substantial payment of $55,000 for his work, which, when adjusted for inflation, equates to $174,000. This was reported to be the highest salary ever earned by an Australian screenwriter at the time. Farrant claimed to have completed the screenplay in just four days.
Originally, the production had selected the young director Richard Franklin to helm the film. Rehearsals commenced in August 1981, with plans to begin shooting in September. Excitement was palpable among the cast and crew as they embarked on rehearsals. However, McNichol, who had final script approval, clashed with Franklin over his vision for the film, resulting in Franklin's sudden departure from the production. Hamilton had the unenviable task of informing the cast and crew that "creative differences" had forced Franklin to exit. This unexpected turn of events left production in a state of uncertainty, forcing Atkins (and presumably McNichol) to return to the United States while the Australian team continued rehearsals.
Ultimately, Ken Annakin was hired as Franklin's replacement. Being more than twice the age of his predecessor, there were concerns within the cast about Annakin's suitability for the role, but production soldiered on.
Filming
With the new director in place, principal photography began in November 1981 and stretched into January 1982. Since McNichol wore a light, natural makeup, none of the "sisters" were allowed to enhance their features with makeup. Two actresses, Rhonda Burchmore and Linda Nagle, arrived with eyeliner on, were reprimanded and forced to remove it. Annakin found himself at odds with McNichol over one annoyance: her chewing gum. She continuously had gum in her mouth, and frequently tried to hide it in her cheek. This led to an outtake that's seen right before the credits roll, which seems fairly random out of context.
Primary locations included the Polly Woodside at the South Melbourne wharf, the Farm and Mansion at Werribee Park, and the Loch Ard on the Great Ocean Road, Port Campbell, from November 1981 to January 1982. Secondary locations included various parts of Sydney, namely McDonald's Cremorne, which is seen in the beginning sequences, after Chris (Atkins) invites Mabel (McNichol) and her friends on the boat, Rushcutters Bay Marina, where Mabel obtains a small sailboat, and Palm Beach for some of the beach scenes. The Stanley family's library, which required a controlled environment for all of the stunt work, was a set erected in a Sydney studio.
Post-production
The film that was released was a little bit different from the film that was shot. "Pumping and Blowin'" was originally supposed to include a sequence with Mabel's sisters frolicking underwater, but this footage was scrapped and replaced with animation by Yellow Submarine veteran Maggie Geddes.
Despite Hamilton's objections, Fox ended up shaving 20 minutes out of the movie, which he claimed had "emasculated" the film and ruined a lot of the jokes. They were particularly sensitive to racial jokes, but other off-colour humor found its way onto the cutting room floor.
Music
The musical numbers, primarily adapted from Gilbert and Sullivan, were written by Terry Britten, Kit Hain, Sue Shifrin and Brian Robertson.
- "Victory" – The Pirates
- "I Am a Pirate King" – The Pirates
- "The Sisters' Song" – The Sisters
- "First Love" – Frederic and Mabel
- "The Modern Major General's Song" – Major General Stanley and Cast
- "Pumpin' and Blowin'" – Mabel
- "How Can I Live Without Her?" – Frederic
- "Hold On" – Mabel
- "Tarantara" – The Policemen
- "We Are the Pirates" – The Pirates
- "Come Friends, Who Plough the Sea" – The Pirates
- "Happy Ending" – Cast
Soundtrack
The Pirate Movie soundtrack album was released by Polydor Records in August 1982, available in both vinyl and cassette formats. The company invested a substantial $800,000 to secure the rights for this release, which would be equivalent to over $2.5 million when adjusted for inflation. However, the album's performance on the American Billboard 200 was modest, reaching only number 166.
Singles were issued for "How Can I Live Without Her?" "First Love" and, exclusively in Australia, The Peter Cupples Band's version of "Happy Ending." "How Can I Live Without Her?" managed to reach number 71 on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100, while "First Love" failed to chart.
In Australia, the album achieved better success, reaching a position of number 39 on the charts. "How Can I Live Without Her" peaked at #31 on the Australian charts, and was even featured on the K-Tel compilation Raiders of the Pop Charts the following year. "Happy Ending" became a signature song for Cupples, who was still performing it decades later.
In most countries, the soundtrack was released as a double album containing the complete versions of all the songs, along with highlights from Peter Sullivan's orchestral score. However, abridged single-album versions were made available in Germany, the UK, the Netherlands, and Argentina, featuring only selected tracks. Despite the variations in track listings, the album's packaging remained virtually identical worldwide, except for Germany, where it showcased alternate poster artwork on the front cover.
: A1 – "Victory" – The Pirates (2:37)
: A2 – "First Love" – Kristy McNichol and Christopher Atkins (4:13)
: A3 – "How Can I Live Without Her" – Christopher Atkins (3:08)
: A4 – "Hold On" – Kristy McNichol (3:14)
: A5 – "We Are the Pirates" – Ian Mason (3:36)
: B1 – "Pumpin' and Blowin'" – Kristy McNichol (3:05)
: B2 – "Stand Up and Sing" – Kool & the Gang (4:32) (from Something Special)
: B3 – "Happy Ending" – The Peter Cupples Band (4:58)
: B4 – "The Chase" – Peter Sullivan and the Orchestra (1:33)
: B5 – "I Am a Pirate King" – Ted Hamilton and the Pirates (2:03)
: C1 – "Happy Ending" – The Cast of The Pirate Movie (4:18)
: C2 – "The Chinese Battle" – Peter Sullivan and the Orchestra (2:36)
: C3 – "The Modern Major General's Song" – Bill Kerr and the Cast of The Pirate Movie (2:00)
: C4 – "We Are the Pirates" – The Pirates (2:18)
: C5 – "Medley" – Peter Sullivan and the Orchestra (4:03)
: D1 – "Tarantara" – Gary McDonald and the Policemen (1:53)
: D2 – "The Duel" – Peter Sullivan and the Orchestra (4:04)
: D3 – "The Sisters' Song" – The Sisters (2:42)
: D4 – "Pirates, Police and Pizza" – Peter Sullivan and the Orchestra (3:32)
: D5 – "Come Friends Who Plough the Sea" – Ted Hamilton and the Pirates (2:00)
Charts
{| class="wikitable sortable plainrowheaders"
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! Chart (1981)
! Peak<br/>position
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! scope="row"| Australian Albums (Kent Music Report)|certyear=1982
Release
Promotion
In preparation for the film's August release, 20th Century Fox embarked on an extensive $3 million promotional campaign. It was one of the earliest movies to feature an electronic press kit distributed on videocassette.
Just prior to the film's August debut, Baskin-Robbins released "Pirates' Gold" as their flavour of the month for July. This ice cream flavour was rum-flavoured and included butter brickle candy pieces, accompanied by playful marketing featuring a pirate-themed caricature of Bill Kerr, who is seen selling the ice cream from a Baskin-Robbins cart at the beginning of the movie.
A total of 179 American shopping malls joined in on the promotional extravaganza. The campaign encompassed various engaging activities such as colouring contests featuring poster artwork, costume contests, treasure hunts, fashion shows, and giveaways. Freebie items included pirate banners, movie posters, chocolate "gold coin" candy, videotapes, and movie tickets. Fox also arranged radio giveaways of sailboards, and Hang Ten gave away exclusive posters. Atkins also showcased his newfound musical talents by performing "How Can I Live Without Her?" on popular shows like American Bandstand, Solid Gold, and the Australian series Countdown, which he even guest-hosted. He also appeared at record store signings to promote the soundtrack. Additionally, the cast version of "Happy Ending" closed ABC's Thanksgiving TV special Dancin' on Air.
The Peter Cupples Band released a music video for their rendition of "Happy Ending" and also appeared on Countdown. Their performance took a dramatic turn as Atkins burst onto the stage, engaging in a mock duel with a pirate.
An additional bit of promotion was ill-timed. The same month that the movie was released, Atkins graced the cover of Playgirl magazine. Although there were no full-frontal images included in that spread, it was an era when male nudity was very taboo, creating a disconnect with the family audience that Fox was targeting for the film's marketing.
Box office
In the USA, the film opened at #5, trailing behind juggernaut E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, Things Are Tough All Over and An Officer and a Gentleman. and dropped off the charts in its third week. Ultimately, the film grossed $7,983,086 in its American theatrical release.
The film earned A$1,013,000 at the Australian box office.
Critical reception
Fox didn't allow the press to pre-screen the film, with executive Vice-President Irv Ivers explaining, "You can look at movies and you can tell if they're going to be killed by critics." He then asked the reporter, "If you were in my place, would you show them?" Just as Ivers foresaw, when the reviews finally surfaced, The Pirate Movie was brutally criticised, with numerous headlines invoking pirate-themed puns, including piracy, shipwrecks, walking the plank, and other stereotypical terminology.
On Rotten Tomatoes, the film has an approval rating of 8% based on 12 reviews. On Metacritic, it has a weighted average score of 19 out of 100, based on reviews from 6 critics, indicating "Overwhelming dislike".
Screenwriter Farrant issued a press statement after the American reviews surfaced but before the Australian release. Farrant blamed "everybody" else for the film's box-office failure, decrying "phallic and homosexual jokes which I didn't write," and denouncing product placement for McDonald's and Baskin-Robbins, asserting, "This is not a film, this is prostitution. The final film is a travesty of my script." Producer and star Hamilton countered Farrant's claims by suggesting that he was "acting irrationally."
Michelene Keating of the Tucson Citizen was bewildered by the audience's reaction, noting, "Everyone who attended the same matinee showing that I did (a sparse attendance and, to my surprise, mostly adults) did not share my opinion of the movie. A woman who sat in front of me laughed quite a bit between going out three times for popcorn refills." The Sunday Pennsylvanians Mary Lou Kelsey was surrounded by a young crowd that made her "feel like you need a walker," and complained that the audience was "laughing hysterically at the most infantile jokes you have ever heard. You might need a walker, but their brains need corrective surgery."
Among the few positive reviews, Martha Steimel of The Witchita Falls Records News gushed that it was a "wonderfully funny," "rollicking frolic," remarking that "the fun of the pirate movie is that we know all along it's a dream." The Orlando Sentinels Sumner Rand called it "a lighthearted, colorful summertime romp," concluding, "Unless you're a Gilbert & Sullivan purist, you should be entertained." Bill Pelletier of The Evansville Press warned that "a trip to the concession stand could rob you of some funny moments," and concluded, "The key to this Australian-made beauties, me hardies, is fun, fun, fun!" The Louisville Courier Journals Owen Hardy remarked that "despite its problems, The Pirate Movie at times displays an infectious inanity," and that "the cast sings with gusto."
The Irish Times review called The Pirate Movie a "travesty" of the Gilbert and Sullivan original and said "with a philosophy of shove everything in regardless, it's nothing more than a waste of Miss McNichol's abilities, the audience's time and the incentives offered to make films in Australia." Leonard Maltin's Movie Guide rated the film as a BOMB and stated: "Not only trashes the original, but also fails on its own paltry terms. It should have been called The Rip-off Movie". TV Guide stated "Pop tunes are mixed in with some of the original G&S songs in a pirate period setting that grates on the nerves, as does the inane toilet humor that substitutes for wit. All the performers, especially McNichol, look as if they can't wait until the film is over, and one can hardly blame them."
Michael and Harry Medved's book Son of Golden Turkey Awards includes The Pirate Movie's "First Love" on its list of "Worst Rock 'N Roll Lyrics in a Movie". The most creative review came from the Argus Leader's Marshall Fine, who set his poetic opus to the rhythm of "The Major-General's Song," ultimately stating, "In short, The Pirate Movie should crawl back into the sewer. At least that's the opinion of this modern film reviewer."
Australian film critic Michael Adams later included The Pirate Movie on his list of the worst ever Australian films, along with Phantom Gold, The Glenrowan Affair, Houseboat Horror, Welcome to Woop Woop, Les Patterson Saves the World and Pandemonium.
Accolades
{| class="wikitable"
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! Award
! Category
! Nominee(s)
! Result
! Ref.
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| rowspan="2"| Australian Film Institute Awards
| Best Supporting Actor
| Garry McDonald
|
| align="center" rowspan="2"|
|-
| Best Costume Design
| Aphrodite Kondos
|
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| rowspan="9"| Golden Raspberry Awards
| Worst Picture
| David Joseph
|
| align="center" rowspan="9"|
|-
| Worst Director
| Ken Annakin
|
|-
| Worst Actor
| Christopher Atkins
|
|-
| Worst Actress
| Kristy McNichol
|
|-
| Worst Supporting Actor
| Ted Hamilton
|
|-
| Worst Screenplay
| Trevor Farrant; <br> Based on the Gilbert and Sullivan's operetta The Pirates of Penzance
|
|-
| Worst Musical Score
| Kit Hain
|
|-
| rowspan="2"| Worst Original Song
| "Happy Endings" <br> Music and Lyrics by Terry Britten, BA Robertson, and Sue Shifrin
|
|-
| "Pumpin' and Blowin'" <br> Music and Lyrics by Terry Britten, BA Robertson, and Sue Shifrin
|
|-
| Stinkers Bad Movie Awards
| Worst Picture
| David Joseph
|
| align="center"|
|}
The film is listed in Golden Raspberry Award founder John Wilson's book The Official Razzie Movie Guide as one of The 100 Most Enjoyably Bad Movies Ever Made.