Marriage in Islam

268x268px|thumb|A Turkish notary drawing up a marriage contract in front of the Kiliç Ali Pasha Mosque, Tophane, Constantinople by [[Martinus Rørbye, 1837]]

In Islamic law, marriage centers around (), which is the marriage contract (also known as ʿaqd al-qirān, nikah nama, etc.), or more specifically, the bride's acceptance (qubul) of the groom's dower (mahr); and the witnessing of her acceptance. In addition, there are several other traditional steps such as khitbah (preliminary meeting(s) to get to know the other party and negotiate terms), walimah (marriage feast) and zifaf/rukhsati ("sending off" of bride and groom).

In addition to the requirement that a formal, binding contract – either oral or on paper – of rights and obligations for both parties be drawn up, there are a number of other rules for marriage in Islam: among them that there be witnesses to the marriage, a gift from the groom to the bride known as a mahr, that both the groom and the bride freely consent to the marriage; that the groom can be married to more than one woman (a practice known as polygyny) but no more than four, that the women can be married to no more than one man, developed (according to Islamic sources) from the Quran, (the holy book of Islam) and hadith (the passed down saying and doings of the Islamic prophet Muhammad). Divorce is permitted in Islam and can take a variety of forms, some executed by a husband personally and some executed by a religious court on behalf of a plaintiff wife who is successful in her legal divorce petition for valid cause.

In addition to the usual marriage intended for raising families, the Twelver branch of Shia Islam permits or "temporary", fixed-term marriage; and some Sunni Islamic scholars permit nikah misyar marriage, which lacks some conditions such as living together. A nikah 'urfi, "customary" marriage, is one not officially registered with state authorities.

Traditional marriage in Islam has been criticized (by modernist Muslims) and defended (by traditionalist Muslims) for allowing polygamy and easy divorce.

Terminology

In the Hans Wehr Dictionary of Modern Written Arabic, is defined as "marriage; marriage contract; matrimony, wedlock". In the Quran, nikah is used to refer to the contract of marriage. According to at least a couple of sources -- Ibrahim B. Syed and the Ahlan Foundation -- the Quran also uses "a strong agreement" (), in verse Q.4:21, to refer to marriage.

In Arabic-speaking countries, marriage is commonly called zawāj (, from the Quranic term zawj (), referring to a member of a pair), and this term has recently gained currency among Muslim speakers of other languages as well.

The marriage contract is known by different names:

ʿaqd al-qirān Literary Arabic: ', "matrimony contract";
' / ALA-LC;
akd, ;
ezdevāj, "marriage" and or sǎnǎde ezdevāj aqd nāmeh (, ) for the certificate.

The marriage celebration may be called

ʿurs / zawāj (),
ezdewaj/arusi (Persian),
shaadi (Urdu),
biye/biya (Bengali)
düğün (Turkish). In Mesopotamia, marriages were generally monogamous, except among male royalty, who would have harems consisting of wives and concubines. The Sasanian society followed Zoroastrianism, which viewed women to be possessions in marriage, although consent was required in both marriage and divorce.

According to Islamic sources, most women in the pre-7th century Arabia had little control over their marriages and Islam brought a big improvement. They were bound by contract for marriage or custody of children, and their consent was rarely sought. Women were seldom allowed to divorce their husbands, and their view was not regarded for either a marriage or divorce. However, in the transitional age from non-Islamic to Islamic society, elite women could divorce and remarry without stigma. They were given the power to negotiate the terms of their marriage contract and could even initiate divorce.

Under the Arabian Jahiliyyah (pre-Islamic) law, Islamic sources write that no limitations were set on men's rights to marry or to obtain a divorce. Islamic law limited men to four wives at one time, not including slave concubines. () Additionally, a man was required to provide a suitable marriage gift for each wife and ensure financial support and separate housing for all. As a result, only wealthy men could historically afford to practice polygyny. The institution of marriage was refined into one in which the woman was somewhat of an interested partner. 'For example, the dower, previously regarded as a bride-price paid to the father, became a nuptial gift retained by the wife as part of her personal property'.

Encouragement

As in many if not all religions, marriage is encouraged in Islam.

Verses from the Quran, indicate positive feelings towards marriage: "marry those among you who are single ..." (Q.24:32), "...Bless us with ˹pious˺ spouses and offspring who will be the joy of our hearts ..." (Q.25:74), " ...He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them..." (Q.30:21), "The love of the desires for women, sons, ... has been made attractive to people." (Q.3:14) “Marriage is part of my sunnah, and whoever does not follow my sunnah has nothing to do with me"(Sunan Ibn Majah)
as part of the religion of the fitrah,
to fight the temptations of illicit sex (zina, a great sin in Islam), "Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty, ....'" (Sahih al-Bukhari), “Whoever has the means, let him get married, and whoever does not, then he should fast for it will diminish his desire" (Sunan Ibn Majah).

According to scholars, marriage in Islam provides a structure for the relationship between partners creating a family, and safeguards rights of members of the family (Ahlan Foundation, Ahmad Dogarawa).

Marrying within the Muslim community and creating a “productive and constructive" family where members help and encourage one and other to "be good and righteous", helps to preserve the religion (Ahmad Dogarawa). is considered a "blessing", a source of stability, the foundation for families. By regulating sexual desire marriage prevents it from destabilizing the community, in the eyes of religious scholars of Islamic law. In a patrilineal society, where a person's social status is defined by their father's lineage, marriage was a crucial institution for controlling reproduction and ensuring that children were properly recognized and claimed (Judith E. Tucker).

Marriage contract

thumb|A Nikah ceremony in [[Bihar, India ]]

thumb|A [[Pakistani bride signing a marriage certificate]]

Islamic marriage is based on a contract (ʿaqd al-qirān, nikah nama, etc.) between man and wife.

Mahr

All Islamic marriage contracts include a ', (donatio propter nuptias), a mandatory sum of wealth provided to the bride by the groom which should be agreed upon before the nikah, and paid to the bride by the groom at the time of nikah unless they have agreed to delay the time of some of its payment. The mahr is for her exclusive use. If the marriage contract fails to contain an exact, specified mahr, the husband must still pay the wife a judicially determined sum. Mahr functions similar to bride wealth. The mahr is important for the wife in case of divorce. (The value of a mahr varies widely. It is often measured in coins with the equivalent weight of 3 grams of silver.) There is no joint marital property in an Islamic marriage. Other conditions may be included in the contract, such as whether the husband taking a second, third, etc. wife, is grounds for divorce.

Whether the bride must give her consent to marry and how she does, varies according to school of jurisprudence, whether the bride is a virgin, or a minor.

The Shafi'i school of jurisprudence do allow compulsion in marriage if the daughter is a virgin and is for her benefit. Shafi'i recommends strongly that daughters who are no longer minors be consulted before being married. (If the bride is a virgin and is silent when asked if she consents to the marriage, that may be taken as her agreement to marry.) According to Al-Masaa’il Al-Maardeeniyyah, by Ibn Taymiyyah. Malak was one of the scholars who ruled that a father may force his virgin daughter who attained puberty to marry.
According to Shi'i mujtahid and marja' Khomeini and Ali al-Sistani, the marriage is invalid without the bride's free consent and no obligation can make marriage official and legal.

Wali

Most Sunni schools of jurisprudence (Hanbali, Shafi'i, and Maliki) require a (male guardian, who if representing a bride is called a )

This indicates that a wife is responsible for the house of her husband. Also that a man should be the guardian of his family, i.e., after his marriage he moves out of his father's house, and runs his own family affairs and is guardian of his family. In a joint family, typically the head is either the father of the husband, or mother of the husband. This also indicates that a husband should look after his parents' house, as "a man is a guardian of his father's property". So the wife should not object to her husband when he is looking after affairs of his parents.

Sexuality

Sexuality in Islam is largely described by the Qur'an, Islamic tradition, and religious leaders both past and present as being confined to marital relationships between men and women, and between slave owners and enslaved females. While most traditions discourage celibacy, all encourage strict chastity and modesty (see haya) with regards to any relationships across gender lines, holding forth that intimacy as perceived within Islam (encompassing a swath of life more broad than strictly sex) is to be reserved for marriage.

Abd Allah ibn Mas'ud narrated:

While adulterous relationships are strictly forbidden, permissible sexual relationships within marriage are described in Islamic sources as great wells of love and closeness for the couple involved. Sexual relationship between married couples are even source of rewards from God as doing the opposite, i.e., satisfying sexual needs through illicit means, has punishment. Specific occasions (most notably daytime fasting (see sawm) and menstruation) are times forbidden for intercourse, though not for other ways of touching and being close to one another. Anal sex with one's wife is also strictly prohibited.

So long as it is within marriage, free of lewdness, fornication and adultery, Islam has sometimes been described as having an open and playful approach to sex.

Marriage in Islam

Terminology

Encouragement

Marriage contract

Mahr

Wali

Sexuality

See also

Notes

References

Further reading

Terminology

Encouragement

Marriage contract

Mahr

Consent of bride

Wali

Sexuality

See also

Notes

References

Further reading