A fake orgasm occurs when a person pretends to have an orgasm without actually experiencing one. It usually involves simulating or acting out behaviors typically associated with orgasm, such as body movements, vocal sounds, and sequences of intensification followed by apparent release. It can also include giving verbal indications that orgasm occurred.
Sex differences
While all genders fake orgasms, women fake orgasms more frequently than men. A survey of 180 male and 101 female college students (introductory psychology students from the University of Kansas), Muehlenhard & Shippee (2009) found that 25% of men and 50% of women had pretended to orgasm (28% and 67%, respectively, for participants with experience in penile–vaginal intercourse (PVI)). Although most fake orgasms occurred during PVI, some participants also reported them during oral sex, manual sex, and phone sex. A 2012 joint survey of men's lifestyle site AskMen and women's lifestyle site TresSugar (now PopSugar) found that 34% of men and 54% of women had at some point faked an orgasm; 26% of women said they faked an orgasm every time they had sex. Other studies have found that anywhere from 25 to 74% of women admit to faking an orgasm at some point in their lives. This is more than the 25 percent of women who, according to Psychology Today in 2010, reported consistently having an orgasm during coitus. Women tend to achieve orgasm during intercourse less readily than men because most women require direct clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm, and not all sexual positions provide access to the clitoris, which can make orgasms difficult to achieve for women. For women in heterosexual relationships, faking an orgasm can also be rooted in deference to their partner, need for their approval, or feelings of shame or sexual inadequacy. As there appears to be 'a sexual script in which women should orgasm before men, and men are responsible for women's orgasms', a woman may feel pressured to fake an orgasm before her partner in order to please them and avoid hurting their feelings. In rare cases, a man is worried that the condom is torn or will tear, and that he will unintentionally make his partner pregnant, and so he fakes an orgasm in order to avoid ejaculation. Brain scans found that, when women were tasked to fake an orgasm, the female brain centres that control conscious movement remained active, whereas when they experienced real orgasms, all activity disappeared from the movement control centres, and the light from the emotional centres of the brain went out as well.
Other factors
[[File:Abc sexsurvey fakeorgasm.png|thumb|275px|right|Reasons for faking orgasm based on ABC News 2004 "The American Sex Survey" poll
People can fake orgasms for number of reasons, such as when their partner wants them to orgasm but they are unable, or when they desire to stop having sex but are not comfortable telling their partner directly, avoiding negative consequences, or for pleasing their partner.
That women should fake an orgasm was, about the year AD 2, recommended by the Roman poet Ovid in his famous book Ars Amatoria:
Patricia Watson (2002) noted that, although a preceding line (sentiat ex imis Venerem resoluta medullis / femina, et ex aequo res iuuet illa duos) advises that women should enjoy sex, too, the context shows that Ovid was primarily concerned with male sexual satisfaction: he recommended which sexual positions would make the woman most appealing to the man, and that if the woman was unable to orgasm, she should at least fake it for her male lover's enjoyment.
People can also fake orgasms for reasons of display or presentation, such as during phone sex,
Women with higher incomes than their partner are twice as likely to fake orgasms and have a lower rate of sexual satisfaction. Perceived masculine fragility also increases fake orgasms and decreases satisfaction.
Feminists have asserted that women faking orgasms is a sign of male-centered sexuality; in a society that celebrates only male sexual pleasure, women may feel pressured to engage in acts that bring their male partners to orgasm but that do not provide them physical pleasure. Women in a discussion group in 1967 analyzed their motivations for faking orgasms and decided that faking was a response to pressures placed upon them by men. As such, the urge to fake an orgasm often sits in a broader context of other problems with sexual repression or male-centered sexuality. Many of these women also experienced feelings such as sexual rejection by their partners, or on the other hand, unwanted sexual attention; some were afraid to tell their partners what they wanted, and others said their partners resented being told what they wanted.
Hugo M. Mialon developed a game theoretical analysis of faking orgasms as a signaling game. Only some of the predictions of his model were consistent with survey data used to check the validity of the model. Among other things, the survey data suggested that both women and men who would be more concerned if their partner were faking are less likely to fake themselves, and that older women and men are more likely to fake than younger ones.
One study of orgasm found that women who fake orgasms were more likely to neglect their partners and flirt with other men at social gatherings. The authors of this study speculated that women who fake orgasms may be more likely to engage in sexual intercourse with men other than their partner, although they recommended caution at interpreting their findings due to a small data set and a large number of variables being studied. If a female has sex with many partners (employing a polygamous mating strategy), her aim may be to secure benefits from multiple males, such as resources, whilst aiming to only reproduce with males of high-genetic quality. and has suggested pair-bonding benefits. Faking an orgasm with a low-genetic quality mate would lead that mate to believe that: a) they could be the father of a child born to that mother Some research has indicated that women who fake orgasm frequently have also been shown to display other mate retention behaviors, which include:
- Mate guarding (e.g. paying attention to who the partner is spending time with and often checking up on them);
- Inter-sexual negative inducements (flirting with another individual whilst their partner is looking);
- Positive inducements (e.g. dressing in a certain manner to impress their partner)
- Displaying possession signals in public (e.g., kissing a partner in view of other females who are seen as a threat); and,
- Intra-sexual negative inducements (e.g., displaying aggressive behavior towards another female who is caught looking at their partner).
The frequency to which these other forms of mate retention occur is directly related to the risk of infidelity; limited research indicates that once the risk of infidelity is controlled for, the prevalence of other mate retention behaviors are greatly reduced. For example, it has been suggested that a main function of female orgasm is to retain the sperm of a favored partner, therefore it is advantageous for men to pay attention to their partners orgasm to ensure they have been selected. While research has shown that 25 percent of males also display fake orgasms, there is limited research into this area with no current evidence suggesting that men fake an orgasm to retain a mate. The main reasons men gave for faking an orgasm is that they wanted the sex to end as achieving orgasm was unlikely but did not want to hurt the feelings of their partner. In this study, accuracy was varied (for example, one man suggesting that his partner never faked orgasm, and his partner suggesting that she faked orgasm 100 percent of the time), but the general moderate accuracy of men in detecting fake orgasm suggests that it may be an evolutionary counter-adaptation by men in order to not be fooled into believing female attempts at implying commitment (monogamy) and in order to detect the true satisfaction levels of the female partner. The idea that men place great importance on female mate orgasm She wrote, "With their men, they often fake orgasm to appear 'good in bed' and thus place an intolerable physical burden on themselves and a psychological burden on the men unlucky enough to see through the ruse." Newspapers and radio talk shows debated her work. Women began to demand equal rights in bed, insisting that their pleasure was its own goal.
The 1989 American film When Harry Met Sally... is well known for a scene in which the character Sally, played by Meg Ryan, fakes an orgasm while sitting in a crowded deli in order to demonstrate how persuasive a fake orgasm can be.
In "The Mango" episode of the American sitcom television program Seinfeld, the main characters Elaine and Kramer admit to faking orgasms, and another main character, George, becomes paranoid that his own girlfriend has been faking orgasms based on Elaine's admission that she faked orgasms "all the time" while with Jerry, who subsequently becomes desperate to have orgasmic sex with Elaine in order to "save the friendship."
See also
- Delayed ejaculation
- Female ejaculation